Hospitality Tips

My friend Susie Cassel is the personification of hospitality. She opens her home to friend and stranger alike, and she is always prepared for drop-by guests. One-on-one or large groups--Susie hostesses all with grace and love. Last night she gave a talk on hospitality, and her practical tips are well-worth sharing.

Susie bases her open-door attitude on Romans 12:13: "Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality" and on 1 Peter 4:9: "Show hospitality to one another without grumbling." Susie says that when seeking to have a hospitable heart, there are four primary things to keep in mind:

1) Hospitality isn't based on having the "right" house.
2) Hospitality isn't always convenient.
3) Hospitality isn't always comfortable.
4) Hospitality is always about serving others.

Susie defines two distinct types of hospitality, both of which we should prepare our hearts to offer. First is calculated hospitality, which includes hosting our friends, making meals for the sick--basically, the sort we can plan ahead. The second type is spontaneous hospitality, which is opening our home and heart to that drop-in neighbor or friend who calls at an inconvenient time. How we handle spontaneous hospitality is a matter of mindset, of putting others ahead of our personal comfort. But that doesn't mean there aren't great rewards for such service: generosity comes back on our heads! But, primarily, every time we open our homes and hearts to someone in need, it is Jesus we are serving. Do we think about that? Do we see today's interruption or inconvenience as an opportunity to love Christ? Jesus said, "Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me" (Matt. 5:40).

Here are Susie's hospitality habits:

1. Decide to get organized. Clean the kitchen immediately after dinner; pick up your room before bed; make your bed as soon as you jump out each morning; in preparation for unannounced guests, keep Windex and papertowels under the bathroom sink so you can dash in and give the sink and mirror a freshening spritz.

2. Alter your attitude about your home. Offering loving hospitality is easiest in a low-maintenance environment. Susie has selected furniture and carpeting that can withstand spills, feet, and large crowds. Another key aspect of hospitality that we often don't think about is how well our homes reflect who we are. Who cares if the artwork on the walls is well-coordinated? If our decorative pieces tell a story about something in our lives--a place we love, a memory, a gift--it is a way of opening up to our guests.

3. Get fixed with food. Susie suggests having two fail-proof meals memorized, meals that can be thrown together in a hurry without needing to pull out measuring cups or read a recipe. Doubling or tripling recipes, such as lasagne or meatloaf, is great preparation for serving others. When Susie makes lasagne, she'll make four pans: one for a family in need, one for her own family, one to keep in the freezer for a spontaneous evening with friends, and one to give away just for fun. In the freezer Susie also keeps homemade, ready-to-bake cookies. After making the dough, she freezes individual cookies on a cookie sheet, and once they are frozen, she transfers them to a baggie for freezer storage. When friends drop by, she pops a few in the oven.

4. Prioritize people. The food you throw together casually and quickly can and often does show more love than a gourmet meal. It's all about your attitude. Is it more important to you to make your guests feel welcome and comfortable or to impress them with your cooking skills? A good way to sabotage the effects of hospitality is to apologize for your home--a messy room, a simple meal, the paper plates. In prioritizing people, Susie emphasizes that hospitality starts with our family. Are we showing hospitality to our husband and children? Do we stop what we are doing when our husband gets home from work to engage him? How about when our children come from school? Do we welcome them home, or is the first thing they hear, "How many times do I have to tell you to hang your coat up!" The hospitality we show to our children will radiate to our guests, and the hospitality we show to our guests will be communicated to our children, and it has a ripple effect outward.

I've spent a good bit of time in Susie's home, so I know these things aren't just theoretical for her. She lives them. I've watched her react to booted feet on her coffee table and spills on her floor--she always rolls with it. There is no fake, polite smile trying to hide an internal freakout; Susie is really okay with it. Why? Because she loves people and she loves Jesus.